This is inspiring me Loyalty requires responsibility and commitment. © 2020 www.azcentral.com. This balance works just fine when things are going well. One of the more courageous decisions leaders have to make revolves around how to separate friendship from leadership.

Here are some of the shared traits: Altruism. It means expecting leaders to be honest and frank (although never unkind) with their feedback and communication. Aristotle C.S. Answer: Both. The old school of leadership will tell you that leaders and bosses can’t be friends because it may lead to favoritism. Like friendship, true leadership having integrity, encouraging others to speak up and tell their truth. C.S. It's OK to disagree with someone's ideas, but personal attacks, insults, threats, hate speech, advocating violence and other violations can result in a ban. It comes down to bringing out the best in those you lead and befriend. The separations, however, were such that relationships beyond mission and duty, many saw as inappropriate thus limiting the opportunities whereby productive relationships could flourish. But I am always believing in that is possible and very important. Decide what needs to be changed, and make sure you communicate early and often why you are making the changes. Yet, friendship and leadership do not have to be mutually exclusive. Having said that, I believe that once things have been established, and the leader knows both who the valuable people are and who they might be able to have honest rapport with, that friendships might be able to develop with a few people. (Photo: Getty Images/iStockphoto). Like friendship, true leadership trust means having confidence in each other, the faith that if anything goes wrong you will be there for each other, and the certainty that no matter how much you err or fail you will never be left behind. Read or Share this story: https://www.azcentral.com/story/money/business/career/2014/08/02/friendship-leadership-separation/13528001/. Both friendship and leadership are about devotion.

She holds both a Ph.D. and an MBA from the University of Nebraska.

It means expecting leaders to be honest and frank (although never unkind) with their feedback and communication. When you go from friend to boss, the friendship as you’ve known it has ended. Wonderful! It’s precious stone in your box of relations.

Welcome to our new and improved comments, which are for subscribers only. It’s an attitude that calls us to reach out when there needs to be a listening ear and to be open when there needs to be understanding—all with sympathy, warmth, and kindness. Great leaders are often able to maintain strong friendships with those they lead.

To find out more about Facebook commenting please read the Conversation Guidelines and FAQs. The new school of leadership says there is a way to be friends without compromising relationships or undermining alliances. Many leaders find it a challenge to maintain the same level of friendships. I appreciate your Lead from Within thoughts on leadership. Do you keep a friend who should be fired on your team a bit longer to protect the individual and for fear of hurting the relationship long term? Answer: If you have to fire a friend, most likely the friendship will end. During my service in the Corps, I found the team-leaders who defied the systemic norms of that time, on and off duty, had the units richest in esprit de corps, productivity and discipline. Honesty. It is important for leaders to establish boundaries with friends and former coworkers by letting them know that at work, the focus is on leadership responsibilities. Although this can be a complex and emotional issue, decision-making can be simplified if you recognize and accept that you must always be a leader first and a friend second. I always love your insights, Lolly. Thank you for being my friend! The purity of soul creates new bonds and finds shared values even in difficult environments. Trust in leadership and friendship gives us someone to rely on. Like friendship, true leadership having integrity, encouraging others to speak up and tell their truth. Honesty. Emerson said friendship is supreme truth of truth and tenderness.

On the other hand, if you don't change enough, they might not respect you or will question why you were chosen in the first place. This empirical observation underscores the content value of Ms. Daskel’s insightful article. They evolve.

Trust. Lead From Within: As leaders, let’s cultivate relationships were we match their efforts, respect their hustle, support their ambition, protect their heart, value their loyalty and uplift their spirits. You will need to register before adding a comment. Your leadership thoughts and insights have really helped me in my leadership role. Allegiance and faithfulness call for us to be steadfast and dependable. Thank You!

You make such great sense, and warm my heart at the same time. This means accepting that some of your friends may no longer be your friends or that certain friendships will have to take a different shape. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. All through my leadership we built relationships across all strata of our organisation in every location. BZ! Love your thoughts on leadership. This article is so well detailed that there is not much to add. Her research focuses on the behaviors that characterize extraordinary leaders. It is completely natural to develop friendships as long as their purpose is not selfish. Suzanne Peterson is an associate professor in the Management Department at the W. P. Carey School of Business at Arizona State University. All rights reserved.

After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. ( Log Out /  2 Be Selective It is far easier in my opinion to move someone regarded and treated as a friend into action, to get things done, than is an unfamiliar person called upon only when needed in an official capacity. Lewis Compassion Emerson Favoritism Friendship and Leadership Honesty Lead from Within Leadership Leadership Development Loyalty Reciprocity Throreau Trust Workplace. Change ), You are commenting using your Twitter account. Friendship influence helps in building relationships. This means accepting that … When you are promoted from the ranks of your peers to a supervisor position, you may need to accept that some of your friends may no longer be your friends. They are spot on and so validating and helpful. Here are some example of situations where the friendship and leadership lines become blurred and suggestions on how to handle them: Promotion decisions. ( Log Out /  People nowadays should choose wisely, or on the other hand, discover the real formula to balance both worlds.

The higher performer should still have strong interpersonal skills, so others will follow him or her. Great leaders are often able to maintain strong friendships with those they lead. "If it's a good decision, and your friendship is functional, your friend might be disappointed but will understand," says psychologist Patricia Sias.

So how can friendship and leadership coexist?

Friendship – OUTSIDE INFLUENCE, Coach Wheeler: Leadership – Leadership by Coach Wheeler, http://www.lollydaskal.com/leadership/the-fine-line-between-friendship-and-leadership/. Retrieved from http://www.lollydaskal.com/leadership/the-fine-line-between-friendship-and-leadership/ […], Copyright © 1991-2020 Lolly DaskalWeb Development by Apollo, A Leadership Manifesto: A Guide To Greatness, 12 of The Most Common Lies Leaders Tell Themselves, 4 Proven Reasons Why Intuitive Leaders Make Great Leaders, 12 Successful Leadership Principles That Never Grow Old, The One Quality Every Leader Needs To Succee, The Fine Line Between Friendship and Leadership - Lolly Daskal | Leadership Development | Lolly Daskal - Layman Leadership, The Top 10 Leadership Posts I Read The Week Of August 3rd | Brian Dodd on Leadership, Leadership vs.

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